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Channel: Girls – Frum Satire
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I found a picture of a untznius girl in your publication and I’m pissed

Dear Mishpacha, My family and I read your magazine on a daily basis, we get them as hand me downs because the subscription is quite pricey and since we live out of town, the old news is never really...

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5 reasons why girls should be able to put tefillin on

I’m pretty sure that the frum world is on high alert at the possible infiltration of Open Orthodoxy to our heimishe institutions such as SAR and Ramaz, who have decided to allow women to don tefillin....

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30 of the most important things I learned in yeshiva

Let me preface this post by saying that I probably would have learned most of the things had I not gone to yeshiva, but going to yeshiva definitely provides an education that is seldom matched...

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What do sexy frum girls and mixed martial arts have in common?

I’m not exactly sure what mixed martial arts and a bunch of random pictures of a bunch of hot frum girls have to do with each other, but yesterday, there was an article called “Have you ever BEEN with...

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Sternberg Hot Dog Story Confirmed

The Sternberg Hot Dog story is one of those frum Jewish urban legends that has never been confirmed. It goes as follows, a girl at Camp Sternberg (a large frum girls camp in upstate NY) was playing...

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I used to just go to shul just for the girls

Being married has its advantages, laundry more than once a month, home cooked meals, and not having to get tested for STD’s every time my crotch starts feeling the fire, but one of the biggest...

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Topless and Tznius

Hippie Tznius by Chaya Miriam Fried With the torches-and-pitchforks rhetoric aimed at Pop Chossid’s article on tznius still hammering in our ears, The Husband and I entered into the anything-goes...

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It’s now untznius to mention a kallah’s name

I’m not sure how they do it in Baltimore (the person who sent this to me informed me that the kollel has a policy against mentioning women’s names), but when I was in yeshiva and someone got engaged,...

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Gender Bending

Gender Bending by Chaya Miriam Fried I, like everyone else, pretended to be shocked when the halachic ruling was released today allowing select couples to choose the gender of their burgeoning babies...

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Tu’Bav and the Single Guy

Guest post by Yonatan Sredni Panui?” the stocky, sweating, balding guy in the un-tucked white dress shirt and tiny knitted kippah atop his head, asked me over the blaring modern Chassidic dance music....

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The Tznius Crisis

Dear Rabbi X, I would like to personally thank you for bringing the issue of tznius to the public. Since I read your letter, it has opened my eyes to a problem that is surely bigger and more severe...

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Picture of the day: Hot Israeli soldier in bikini

Come up with a good caption for that one and thank Hashem for creating such beauty.I now know why the Charedim are going to fight to the death against going to the army, if they saw stuff like this...

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Facebook is boring when you’re not trying to get some

Now that I’m not trying to score with the ladies, Facebook has gotten kind of boring. I used to be clever in my status updates and pretty much use Facebook as a tool to get girls. I’m sure that most...

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A Single girls perspective on the shidduch crisis and narrow mindedness

The Shidduch Crisis and the Tyranny of Narrow Mindedness: A Single Girls Perspective (but what the heck can I possibly know, I’m not married…) Guest Post by Deena Sasoon Here is what you need to know...

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Find me a shidduch: Into BDSM and Math

I know a lot of you may not want to admit this, but frum people may actually have sexual preferences. It also appears that sexual preferences are quite important, but there’s no way that this sort of...

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The shidduch crisis comes down to girls being too unattractive

Why is it that the only frum girls that any frum guys ever talk about being attractive are chabad girls? Have you ever wondered about this phenomena? Have you ever wondered why there’s no shidduch...

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Fum girls don’t become feminists

I’m not sure that women wanting to lain or say kiddush is necessarily feminism, but in the frum community it’s been deemed such and so I’ve been wondering why it is that frum girls usually don’t get...

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Shit married girls say to singles

I hope to continue to say all sorts of shit to singles, but I sure as hell hope I don’t start telling people they are picky or what segulas they should do to help them find their mate. I found this...

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An argument against shomer negiah?

January’s been a slow work month for me so I’ve been wandering around the J-blogesphere a little at night. I came across Masculine Jew the other night, which appears to be a blog written by an...

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Shidduch Resume: 5ft 4, 110lbs, 34:24:35

I haven’t posted quite so many shidduch resumes on this site, because most people have only started to think beyond the pale of shidduch websites, asking their friends and facebook stalking. Most of...

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